Am I selfish?

No one reads so I guess no one will care. This blog is like the large painting I set up and poured my heart into, and no one to view it. My friends, or people I thought were my friends all deserted me. My head says, 'No surprise' and my heart screams 'Why?'


I didn't know that by demanding the truth, I was being selfish. That I was causing harm to others.

It did stun me, to hear someone tell me im selfish and emo, and that thye never liked me, and i knew it.


Tears still do not come. Even though they would be welcome company.

I don't know what to do, it seems all i have known is how to agitate and anger people.

I'm sorry to anyone I was selfish to in my words, actions or thoughts. I didn't know I was causing such harm.

I am nothing this world wants. Only a thorn that people are unfortunate enough to come across. It tries to guard the rose, that warrants the full attention, and the thorns measly attempts at protecting it are for not.

So now what?I understand why people hate me now. All I can do is sit in pain and try to ignore it. I can't find anyone like myself physically or spiritually. its about time to call off the search party. I'm too weird, too emotional, too weird.

And the pauper stood with his book
convincing the crowd he was the prince,
but when he became what he thought the crowd wanted,
The people turned their heels and left.
Oh silly prince thou art not! you are nothing more than the measly pauper.
Scurry to your errands for your half a pence per day.
Perhaps soon you may be the prince.
Before you rot away.